SEC Preview: We Comin’
It is coming up on 12 years since the last time a team from the Southeastern Conference has cut down the nets in the first weekend of April. You may ask yourself, WHY? Well there are a lot of reasons that come to mind if you ask me:
Coach Calipari has a severe case of the yips.
Kentucky was the last team to take the title in 2012. Since then they have been back in 2014 as a 7 seed and were taken down by 8 seed UCONN coached by the great Kevin Ollie (Was let go 3 years later). On paper, the 2015 Cats were the best to touch the hardwood since John Wooden’s UCLA run, but couldn’t take down the kids from Madison when it counted. Since then, they have found their way back to the tournament but have made an embarrassment of themselves almost every year they participate.
Paul Finebaum’s receding hairline.
As the late Nipsey Hussle once said, “Sometimes you need to take two steps back to take ten steps forward.” Mr. Finebaum has been holding onto the horseshoe on top of his head for too long, and has been a detriment to the conference. Let’s take this home Paul, and get our conference back to being great again.
No one knows how to ball.
Being a conference that has been known for their efforts on the gridiron, sometimes you might forget that basketball starts in mid-November. After doing my due diligence this fall, I have noticed a trend of illiteracy in the south eastern parts of the United States (This actually might have been going on for decades).
Now that I have put the facts out there to marinate, I would like to start my preview:
#3 - University of Tennessee Volunteers (24-8)
Dalton Knecht decided he was done hitting the ganja and left Northern Colorado for Rocky Top and has been a hit ever since. This is what folks in the Whole Foods wine aisle like to call an “Exciting White.”
Floor: First weekend exit
Ceiling: Elite Eight
#3 - University of Kentucky Wildcats (23-9)
It usually isn’t the best sign when your two best players on your team come off the bench, but somehow they have found their way into the most favorable position in the entire bracket. The only thing in their way: a competent defense.
Floor: Choke to Oakland
Ceiling: Cut down the nets in Phoenix
#4 - University of Auburn Tigers (27-7)
Bruce Pearl has his team firing at the right time and Charles Barkely will “GUARANTEE” this team can take it all. Unfortunately, winning the SEC Tournament hasn’t correlated to much success in the Big Dance.
Floor: Round of 32
Ceiling: Sweet Sixteen
#4 - University of Alabama Crimson Tide (21-11)
Nate Oats tries to distract the committee with his lavish sport coats but I can see right through it. The Tide will be shooting blanks without their star forward from last year, Brandon Miller.
Floor: Upset by Charleston
Ceiling: Sweet Sixteen
#6 - University of South Carolina Gamecocks (26-7)
The Gamecocks ruffled their feathers early on this year but were outshined by their ladies and forgot how to play in February.
Floor: First Round
Ceiling: Sweet Sixteen
#7 - University of Florida Gators (24-11)
Todd Golden was a home-run hire by the team in Gainesville, but have recently been hit by a native to our land, Kyrie Irving, with a broken ankle. The Louisville run in honor of Kevin Ware was magnificent, but the allegations were too strong and stripped them of the title.
Floor: Round of 32
Ceiling: Sweet Sixteen
#8 - Mississippi State University (21-13)
Going up against Tom Izzo in March is a recipe for disaster. Fortunately, the Bulldogs have hit their stride while Sparty lost to Iowa at home. There has been a lot of buzz lately on how the Spartans made the tourney, and the Bulldogs are about to expose them.
Floor: Round of 32
Ceiling: Round of 32
#9 - Texas A&M University (20-14)
Buzz Williams will always be a respected leader of men in the SEC, and has proven it with his deep run in the tournament this last week in Nashville. Only one team has beaten Kentucky twice this season and that is the Aggies. They make shots they shouldn’t, and to win a title you need luck on your side.
Floor: Tominaga Happens
Ceiling: They lose a close one to Houston
There you have it folks, it is not looking good this March for our beloved teams in the Big Dance. We might have to take some of the NIL money that Trev Alberts got from the oil refineries and start funding our basketball teams with it. With that being said, I will offer my lock of the bracket:
To win it all: Kentucky +2500
Cousin Mike 3/18/24